What will they say when you're gone? When your great-grandchildren see your name, will they have any idea what kind of person you were? What will they find out if/when they research you?
Will they be proud to be related to you? Will they be embarrassed if people found out?
Do you like who you've become? Do you like who people know?
It's can be a confusing distinction between worrying what others think of you and displaying who you want them to see. That's a hard line to draw .
The difference lies in how you tell your story.
Are you asking permission to take a certain path, or are you taking someone along on your adventure?
I see my life as an adventure. I didn't always. I wanted someone to tell me I'm making the right decisions. That way I have someone to blame when things don't turn out.
I've made mistakes in my life. I can blame them on someone else because they said it was a good idea. I can wait for someone else to fix a mistake we made together. I can blame myself for not having better judgment (trusting the wrong person) or I can take responsibility for my own life and clean up the mess before it gets worse.
I moved to a different state, over 1000 miles away from my family, my friends, my home......as well as all my resources.
I was following my (now ex-)husband who was following a couple of friends who recommended it after they moved down there. We figured we were a young couple just starting our life together. We were looking to plant some roots.
We soon lost touch with those friends and never quite felt at home there and I wanted to come home.
When I told my husband, he said he was working on it. He said we'll save up and get there on day, but i didn't want to wait. I didn't see any progress moving us closer to that goal.
One day, I called a friend and arranged to have somewhere to stay when we get back, until we can save and get a place of our own. (We ended up staying with her and her family for over a year.) I got a trailer hitch put on the back of my little Honda Accord. I put signs up in the whole apartment complex saying "Moving Sale".
My husband was an over the road truck driver at the time so he was often gone. One of the big reasons I wanted to come home.
That Friday I opened my door that had a sign hanging from it that read "Anything You See, Make Me an Offer". I let everyone into my home to help me reach my goal.
I was on a mission! I was going home!
That Monday, I took my 5 week-old son for his first appointment. I made sure I was cleared to drive with him. I was so proud to tell the doctor we were going home.
Of course, my husband took credit for getting us home. He didn't understand what it meant to me. I still had plenty of stuff to clean up in my life, but that was part of the start of my journey. It meant something to him to be the man. The provider. He was trying to support his family, but he wasn't looking at the big picture.
He didn't notice that while he was focusing on the problem, I was looking for solution.
I tell this story because it's one of my favorites, as far as how I want to be remembered: as a woman who makes things happen! When she sets out on a mission, she'll stop at nothing to make it happen.
Thank you for hearing my story. I look forward to getting to know your story too and I hope to be a part of yours one day.